The Youngest President


When I was younger I became known across the world for being the first President of the United States under 18. Some say it was a publicity stunt, but I’ll assure you, I made big decisions. Do you remember the national debate on whether that dress was white and gold or black and blue? I made the executive decision that it was white and gold. Of course, the big reveal proved I was wrong, but I like to think that my lowest approval rating then made my highest approval ratings later much sweeter.

My job wasn’t all difficult national debate stuff, occasionally I had to deal with other world leaders. This was easy, because adults can’t say no to a kid. So I successfully annexed China, Canada, Russia, and Ecuador.

My life wasn’t all peaches and roses though. Being a kid president was difficult though. Sometimes the other world leaders would stay up late to talk about politics, but my bed time had come and I had to leave. That was my darkest hour, not only did my vice president lose the state of Oklahoma in a game of Uno, but the Secret Service said they were all laughing at me behind my back.

My Vice President (pictured above) really let me down.

So I realized it was time to quit. The world had seen enough of me. I was going into retirement.

And that’s where I am now. I am retired. Here in this mental institution.

2 thoughts on “The Youngest President

  1. Ha! Reminds me of an episode on “Last Week Tonight with John Oliver” where he shares the fictional story of a boy who was elected president, but eventually realizes it sucked and he quits (I’m sure I’m missing some key points).

    He then offers this to Trump (before the election) as a strategy to help him escape the horrible predicament he was in. If he won the election, he would have to do all sorts of nasty presidenty stuff.

    Seems like such a long time ago already.

    Liked by 1 person

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